When the inner Jericho walls crumble
This piece explores the tragedy of the Dickason murders. Psychology can help us understand how to prevent tragedies such as this one. But, because parental violence against the young is such a scary field, the help that is available often doesn’t get used. Also, some people in the news media misunderstand the role of psychology and, therefore, do not make these helpful approaches known. Trying to understand what is behind a tragedy such as the Dickason murders doesn’t mean murderous behaviour is absolved. Rather, it illustrates how understanding maternal post-natal depression and psychosis can hopefully prevent similar tragedies.
When the inner Jericho walls crumble
What happens when we do not get the necessary help while experiencing emotional overload?
Typically, emotional distress affects our performance.
Upset in a child or student’s immediate family can show up in lower marks or even in a fail. Many a student drops out when external turmoil sparks a depressive, inner response.
But, some among us construct an elaborate internal intellectual defence edifice against strong, difficult feelings. This inner set of Jericho walls helps to boost achievement in difficult times which sees others falter.
Problem is difficult feelings don’t go away. Inner turmoil cannot be wished away forever. Ultimately, it breaks through, whether one recognises it consciously or not.
Emotional overflooding reaches its high mark in our solitary activities, such as studies and sleep. It corners us when we are isolated and emotionally overburdened and overstretched.
Many of us reach out for help when there is overload. Those who have been suppressing their feelings forever may not trust help.
We see that when we follow the tragic story of Lauren Dickason who fled unrest here, in South Africa, and succumbed to her own, internal demons in September 2021 when she killed her three young daughters.
It was similar, too, when Manuela Costa, like Lauren also a general practitioner, killed two of her four sons in 1998 (two survived and were sent to an uncle in Portugal while Manuela faced the law).
While Lauren has just been convicted for murder in New Zealand, Manuela’s South African legal team managed to get her freed. They succeeded in convincing the highest authorities that she was psychotic when she killed her sons.
There are many similarities and differences in the two cases. What stands out for me is that these two women were general practitioners who must have ministered to many patients with emotional problems. They were both married to men who specialised in the medical field. Graham Dickason became an orthopaedic surgeon and Jose Gil a psychiatrist.
None of the four seemed able to use psychological help while having to look after their young families. That is apparent for me, especially in the Dickason case, because Lauren’s many signals of being in emotional trouble were not taken up as warning signs and treated (many of her messages were mentioned in reports).
Manuela and Jose had four sons in quick succession.
At the time that Manuela injected her sons with drugs and set her house alight, Jose had been dead for two years. He apparently committed suicide while under suspicion for medical aid fraud.
In addition to losing Jose through divorce and death, Manuela had lost her own mother and had to deal with breast cancer. She set her house alight two days before it would go on auction.
Lauren had help with infertility, a miscarriage, as well as three young children, one of whom had a harelip that had to be surgically fixed.
We know very little about Graham, as Derilene Marco pointed out in the Sunday Times of 20 August 2023. While nobody has indicated why he missed all his wife’s signals of distress it is probable, I think, that his internal Jericho is still standing triumphantly tall.
In the field of psychoanalytic psychology in which I work we know families with multiple children which follow each other closely in age is like a red flag for budding disaster. That such families can really benefit from therapeutic input.
Infant mental health and postnatal depression studies and practices undergird the importance of emotional support for all concerned, especially the primary caregivers who are often the mothers.
Multiple struggles, including multiple losses (which also cover divorce and emigration, two high stressors), also indicate the need for therapeutic help lest unacknowledged rage boils over.
The Dickason and Gil-Costa cases are reminders that disasters that could have been prevented so often happen before they can be stopped.
Especially these two cases are a reminder that medical training itself is often defended against strong, difficult feelings. That medical students face a relentlessness in their training that doesn’t encourage them to stop and take emotional stock.
In those who are already very defended, their inner set of Jericho walls might seem impenetrable and safe. Yet, we are all vulnerable and frail as humans. At some point our manic defences will crumble. Unattended depression will implode and explode. If not checked, tragedy may follow.
It is my sincere wish that these two tragedies will spur us on to taking help when needed rather than scorning psychology as a crutch for the weak. The moment we want to name and shame others rather than face ourselves, we need to stop, we need to pay attention to what it is that we are trying to keep hidden.